JUST TEXT ME ALREADY! ARGH

You know when you don't hear from someone for ages & it drives you WILDLY insane~

Friend. Family member. Loved one. That cutie you gave your phone number to..

No text, no phone call, no email, no snail mail, no carrier pigeon messages.

And being the stubborn dutch girl that you are..

I mean.. being the stubborn girl that you are..

I mean.. being the girl that you are..

I mean.. being YOU.. whoever you might be..

You refuse to contact them first.

Out of spite? Yes. Ofcourse. What other reason even exists?

Ahh, so lame. So very lame!

It's such high school level stupidity.

But you know that if you leave it long enough you figure they'll have to contact you first.

Wont they?

It's almost like that game you play at school, 'Mercy,' where you hold your friends hands, turn your arms inside out & whoever hurts & yells out 'Mercy' first, is the loser? Even if you are hurting, you still refuse to yell out because you don't want to lose..

Why do we play this silly little mind trip game?

Or should that be.. why do I play this silly little mind trip game?
I haven't the faintest idea!
As time goes by you start to think about other people, places, life, planning that trip overseas..
You may even totally forget about said person who hasn't contacted you.
Who??
Oh yeah, i used to know them. I wonder what they're up to these days..
And then casually minding your own business one evening while sitting on your friends couch, your phone buzzes.
'Oooh!! A text! I wonder who it's from!?'
Oh. It's you. Really? YOU. That's so damn random!
You sit there staring at your phone for what feels like millennium's.. REALLY?!
I just got THAT message?! From you?!
That's awesome!
So nice to hear from you, it's been a while.
I can't help but wonder why you are now suddenly wanting back in my life though, ahh the plot thickens.
The moral of this story? There is no moral of this story. It's just a story. And it's also a complete contradiction of last weeks post.
What?
You have to mix it up & keep it interesting!
xox

You Get Under My Skin

Dear Excellent Blog Readers :)

Do you know someone, have a friend or even just an acquaintance who just gets under your skin every time you are in 

contact with them?

Whether its a text, email, online chat, phone call or face to face.

Boy or girl.

I do.

Although, i would never admit that or tell you who.

I'll just continue to let you think I'm referring to you.

And by doing this, maybe i will get the upper hand over you.. but then, if you don't realise it's you, then it's my loss. Again. But we'll both never know.. have i lost you with that ramble?! I do believe i just did a full circle.

***
They always seem to have the upper hand & be one up on you.

Always.

You feel like you have to claw your way back to some form of normality & resistance only for them to irritate you again & again, shoot you down over & over.
Tearing you to shreds.
Teasing you.
Is that the best you've got? Come on.
Give it to me.
Do your worst.
***
Yet... all you want is more of it.
You are hungry for it, ravenous.
What's a bit of banter between friends?

You get under my skin & i hate it!
Or should that be, you get under my skin & i love it..

And for some idiotic reason i cannot for the life of me not react.

You know that saying 'Every action has a reaction.'
That's me to a tee.. well, only in this instance.

Usually, i can easily turn the reaction off so you would never know.. but this is something else.

Is it because I find them a challenge & therefore want more & more to do with them because i feel like i need to prove myself to them, even though i know i don't have to prove myself to anyone?

I'm going to go with.. Yes!
What would this blog be without a shout out to good ol' Blue Eyes, Mr Frank Sinatra?

I guess it would just be another blog really.
He sang 'I've got you under my skin...'
..and I do.

And ofcourse:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C1AHec7sfZ8

Peace out Tiger.

xox

I'm Sorry.

Such little words, such a big impact on life.

They can make you or break you to pieces.
When someone says:

ie: I'm sorry i hurt you/ I'm sorry i called you that/ I'm sorry i was inconsiderate of you..

OR

I'm sorry, we're just not meant to be together/  I'm sorry, it's not you, it's me..

See, it can make or break you!

But what if you are the one apologising.

Even on a good day it can be hard to do.

I'm not talking about the 'Sorry i rammed my trolley into the back of your legs' at the supermarket type thing.

I mean things that actually matter.

(not that you can get away with ramming your trolley into someone without an apology, that's just rude..)

To humble yourself, put pride & ego aside.. yuck, no one wants to come across as being soft or a pushover but if it's going to be a genuine apology, then get with it.

I had to do this recently.

Le sigh*
I am an embarrassment to myself at times!

You know when you say something that is highly inconsiderate of the person you are saying it to & it's something that could cut them to the bone in an instant?

That was me.

*Ouch, baby, ouch.

I am not stoked about my actions in any way shape or form.

I'm sorry.

...being me (yes, I'm the first to admit I am a bit slow on the uptake, even at the best of times) it only took about 1hr for me to realise I was in fact in the wrong.

Ah crap.
And then you go into that instant meltdown feeling where you have to absolutely fix the problem/apologise before it escalates into something that it should never have been in the first place & you go into overdrive & you feel like the worst person in the history of human LIFE.. yeah. 

But once the penny had dropped- I apologised instantly.
Apology accepted.

And it felt good.

Le Fin.

xox

SYDNEY Vs 2x MELBOURNIAN WOMEN

What can 2 young, single women get up to with 5 nights in Sydney?
A lot. You would think.

Here are some short stories:

*After arriving in Sydney & turning on my phone, i noticed a friend had suggested cocktails.

I was off to a good start & i hadn't even collected my bags yet!

We went to Shady Pines Saloon~ it was cool.

Recommended is the Buffalo Trace bourbon, straight & shot, it will not disappoint. I promise. 

Follow it up with some Mexican & you've

had a brilliant night!*

~Upon leaving the Saloon, your friend informs you of a big celebratory night they recently had here & how they woke up with a mysterious permanent marker in their pocket the following morning. Random. But then a couple days later, you are reflecting on this conversation & realise that on this particular celebratory night, your friend sent you this picture:

'Get back in line' ...i can't help but wonder if this in fact was my friends handy work~

*I had very inconspicuously hidden a spare set of keys for my Smash friend, who was yet to arrive, under a sign post in the middle of the road outside our apartment. It was genius. Who would look in the shrubs for keys? Here is the link to our place, its fantastic: http://www.stayz.com.au/17128 ~this is our actual apartment. Totally gorgeous & i want to show it off to you!*

*If you check out that link, you'll notice there are windows in the bathroom.. all I've got to say is, it's a little bit awkward when you shower with the windows wide open to let out the steam & while you are conditioning your hair, you look out across the way & you spot a family sitting down to dinner. You think 'hmm, if i can see them this easily... there's probably a 100% chance they can see me & I don't want to put them off their dinner.' Windows closed.*

*We hit up a 3 day convention while we were in town which was very pleasant. On day 1, we got told we were 'Striking' & that we 'Stood out from the crowd because we looked different to everyone else.' As for the style in general, it wasn't exactly out of this world but to be honest, i would have to say people do know how to put an outfit together & look suave. Whether its a red leather tie or a pair of baby blue pants teamed with navy jacket,

it was nicely put together.*

*Then there were drinks at the Novotel. Being surrounded by the beautiful people & not knowing many there, definitely makes one feel insanely shy! Yes. That would be me I'm referring to. (As in, the shy one.. not the beautiful one) So instead of being all up in someone's grill, i chilled in the background sipping frangelico & lime while observing.*

*The Food: Mexican, Italian, Japanese. Win.

There is an amazing Japanese restaurant down the road from our place. In true Japanese style when you walk in, you are greeted with 'Irashimase!' (Welcome) & if you have ever been to Japan, you would know that when you walk into a shop, you are always greeted with that.

We found a nice Italian place called Love Supreme. And boy did we love it!

http://lovesupreme.com.au/

Get the YABASTA or ORECCHIETTE.*
~Although we didn't get it, apparently the Leone is also good~

*We ventured out into the glorious sunshine cruising around the city & Hyde Park. To our surprise, we got tan lines! We also hit up a pier right near the Opera House & Sydney Harbour Bridge. We soaked up the sunshine & were interrupted by an American guy asking us to take photos of himself holding up signs with mushy messages of love on them for his girlfriend! It was adorable! I wanted in on the cuteness so i jumped in a photo with him & made a love heart with my hands :) He then went on to tell us his name was Steadman & he was in a band who are playing a gig at Hisense Arena in Melbourne this weekend & he would get us free tickets.*

*Hitting up one of our favourite little spots- Gusto's at Fiveways- for breakfast/ brunch catch ups with a mate from Melbourne was lovely. It had been a long time between lattes.*

*How could i forget! The Lowenbrau. German Pub. German Beer. 2x Melbournian~European descendant women. Yes. It was as tasty as i rememebered. http://www.lowenbrau.com.au/

Sitting there minding our own business, a group of guys walked in. I took this poor quality, sneaky photo.. who needs pants? Seriously.*

*I think thats about it for now.

Thanks Sydney.

xox

SICK/TWISTED/MIND

....and that's just the inner workings of me!

So i was emailing a couple of friends earlier in the week & we were discussing how it is often beneficial to keep a diary if you're going through a hard time/good time/rad time/bad time/glad time/sad time etc.

That sort of thing.

Not so much a diary you write in daily.

'Dear diary, today i wanted to sleep in, but noooo, i have to get up for stupid boring school...'

No. *Yawn.

I was talking more of a diary you write in when you needed to get something off your chest. 

Theres' something therapeutic about writing down all your thoughts, feelings, emotions that can help you deal with it.

Whether its something good or bad that's happening in your life.

Personal experience has taught me this.

ie: loves, hates, annoyances, sorrows, secrets (whether they are yours or someone elses!) who you wish you could punch/slap/kick in the face, hilarious experiences you have with your friends, sketches of aforementioned scenarios, even keeping photos in there that no one else should ever see.

Uh Huh. 

In high school I had a diary that I'd write in when things like

that came up.  

It was so good at the time!

Yes yes yes.

You have to absolutely write down every single detail/thought/emotion, no matter how wild/dumb/stupid/hurtful/idiotic/it feels, otherwise it will linger in your brain forEVER & drive you insane!

Get it all out.

Who cares what you say- you are the only person who will

be reading it. 

For some, it's about being ok to let go of something & knowing we've done everything absolutely humanly possible & in our strength to fix it/change it/whatever it.

It's all fine & dandy to believe something but it's another thing to actually accept it for ourselves.

This can take weeks, months or even years.

Physically writing our thoughts down.. can be somewhat soothing.

It's raw & unpretentious.

Its almost like a confession of someone who is vulnerable.

It's you.

...did i get somewhat off track?!

Back to it. 

I'd write about all my crushes & dumb stuff like that.

ie: 'Today walking down the corridor at school, *insert name here* called me 'babe' WOW! I was so stoked, I didn't think

he knew i existed!'

 Blah etc etc blah.

Utterly dumb teenage trash like that.

It was actually quite embarrassing to read years later.

I definitely also wrote about deeper more important things than that. This was purely an example.

As for my high school diary... i ended up burning it in our open fire place one night.

I figured, it was safer to burn the evidence.

..except for those photos i mentioned earlier.. i kept those.

XOX

ps- It was quite exhilarating to burn that!