GUEST BLOG: 'So, I hear you like cats.' By El Vampiro

Hello Blog readers!
How's this for something special~
One of my long time friends, who is practically like a big brother to me, asked this morning if he could write a Guest Blog.
I was stoked at the idea!
So.. here goes, i hope you enjoy it,
xox

You’re a cat person or you’re a dog person. You can’t like both, there is no middle ground. If you’re a cat person, lets get it out there straight up, YOU HAVE NO SOUL…


- Guide dogs/Seeing-eye dogs, yes. Cats? NO – SELFISH BLACK HOLES
- You occasionally hear stories of bad smells coming from neighbours apartments & later find that the owner had been dead for two days & had been partially eaten by their cat. I’ve heard this personally more then a few times, ever with a dog? NO
- Dogs are so awesome, they made a show about one that continually saved the day. This dog was called Lassie, even a Flipper the dolphin was capable of doing good things. Ever heard of show about a cat saving the family continuously? I didn’t think so!
- Dogs are so beautiful and sensitive they literally know their masters voice & can tell if they're getting called by their name or not. Cats? They don’t care about you or the useless name you gave them and will only come to you if they think you're going to feed them, in fact call them anything & they wouldn’t know the difference with names.
- After earthquakes & terrorist attacks, do you ever hear of rescuers using cats to find survivors in the rubble? Cats dragging along sleds in the ice purely so humans don’t have to walk? Sniffer-cats helping the cops find the murders, rapists and criminals? No.
- You come home in a bad mood or even the slightest bit annoyed & the dog will sense it, come to you as you crumble to the floor & just put its paw on you in a gentle way of saying “Hang in there dude!”. A cat? It won’t even touch you unless it thinks its getting food & only then it might rub its body on your pants leaving multitudes of filthy hair everywhere. YUCK!
- Dogs dream. You can sometimes see their paws slightly kick & even the occasional yelp as they're trying to save you in their dream – its beautiful. Cats? They nap. All day, just waiting for you to fall asleep too so they can kill you & have a comfy place to dig their razor sharp claws into.
- Cats have no loyalty, they could leave you and just go where the food is, no stress. Dogs have one owner. One Master – YOU! And will do almost anything for you. They don’t care if you worked all day outside and smell filthy or you just came home from a hit and run & have the body in your boot ready to hide, they would be the first to help “I’ll dig the hole for you dude!” Cats? You're guilty from the second they look at you.
- If someone who you're close to who knows everything about you & you both intimately trust each other, tells you not to trust someone you pretty much take their word for it because you know they don’t want you to get hurt/murdered. Why do you think dogs hate cats so much? Because they’re evil. Cats are evil.
Don’t even start me on they’re stupid faces, they can’t show emotion. No sad, no happy, no painful just the same stupid face all the time. Yuck.
~El Vampiro.

*SNEAKY* Airport SURPRISES!

Feb 14 2012
Marks the 2nd day this year that i have surprised friends at the airport on their Melbourne arrival!
Why do i do it? Because its FUN!
Its the unexpected. The thrill. The excitement of it all!
The first time, i was carrying an arm load of brightly coloured balloons.
The second time, i was wearing a big red bow tied around my body like i was a present.
I love surprises!
More importantly, i love it when i am the one giving the surprise.
In the lead up to the surprise day, you get to be all sneaky & be like a secret agent trying to find out much needed information so that it will all run smoothly on the day.
I started working this out about 2 weeks in advance.
Observe:
You need to put your friends off the trail completely before they are even on your trail.
'So, when do you get home? Cool story. Let's go get a beer.'
~seems random, but you found out the date they come home.
'So, what time do you get home? Cool story. Let's go get a beer.'
~seems random, but you found out the time they get home.
Next, you need to work out what airline they're flying with, if it's a domestic flight or international flight & where they are flying from. 
'So, is Jetstar taking you home via Perth again? yuk!'
~seems random to ask that specifically, but you still find out the needed information in your friends reply.
It seems everything is in place & ready to play out.
Excellent.
Oh! How could i forget to tell you this.. while all of this has been going on, you inform your friends on the day they are due to arrive that you 'don't want them back.'
Ofcourse you are only joking, but it does add a little more depth to the surprise i think...
The day has finally arrived.
At the airport with a carload of friends, sipping some beers, snacking, chatting & laughing away at how terrible we look wrapped in a big red bow.. you decide to go for a wander, thus separating yourself from your 3 friends.
'I'll meet you guys at the gate in 10 minutes!'

You check with airport staff about flights.
You go to the gate.
There is no one as far as the eye can see.
It's now 10 minutes after they supposedly landed.
You are alone, at the opposite end of the airport, wearing a big red bow & ignoring the strange looks you are getting as you walk through security.
cue *PANIC SWEAT*
Then.
THEN.
There's that heavy feeling in your gut.. no, not from what you just ate... 
Where the hell are they? Have i missed it completely?
No. Surely not.
Hell no. It was planned to a TEE.
It was PERFECT!
You decide to head back to where you left your other 3 friends.
On your way, you make a quick phone call & are told 'Yeah, we're here with them now. Where are YOU?!'
..and then there's that awkward moment when you realise you are at the wrong gate, you got told the wrong airline, which in turn makes you nearly burst into tears & you show up 5 minute's after everyone else has done your big SURPRISE!
FAIL.
No, you weren't there for the initial surprise.
But your friends were stoked to see you.
So i guess at the end of the day.. mission accomplished?!
xox

L O V E~

Before you start snickering... I'll say it first...

I am definitely not an expert on this subject, that is for damn sure!
Constantly doing the wrong thing or saying the wrong thing & failing everytime = me!

(hey... atleast I'm consistent!)

Now that I've got that out of the way, you can stop laughing at me.

Today's blog isn't about my life/experiences.

It's about friends getting engaged :) being adorable & loved up.

In the last week, i have heard of 4 couples getting engaged.

FOUR COUPLES!

That's 8 people, 4 sparkly engagement rings, 4 nervous guys, 4 proposals, 4 ecstatic, amazing, beautiful women... & the guys are pretty good too!

To say that there is so much love in the air right now...

is a massive understatement.

It seems there is love in the air & the water & the food in Melbourne right now.

Everyone is getting an injection of it in their lives right now in one way or another.

Whether it's friends getting engaged & you're over the moon happy for them or if it is in fact YOU!

It's beautiful! There's an overflow of it.

I am seriously losing track of who's single, who's dating, who's engaged, who just got married & who's expecting their first kid!

It's actually ridiculous. Ridiculously good, ofcourse.

So this is a celebration for them!

To all the beautiful, gorgeous, loved up couples out there...

CONGRATULATIONS!

Huge hugs & kisses galore to you from the bottom of my heart.

Love. Love. Love. And happiness. To infinity.

xox